If you ’ re trapped in the pain of endless arguing , here are symptoms that the brick wall between you and your partner is getting high :
98 www . AspireMAG . net | December 2023 / January 2024
your kids ( or yourself ) through the pain and trauma of a divorce . That would be horrible .
But is having the kids hearing all the arguing and upset in the house every day really any better ?
In your most honest moments , maybe you ’ re even worried about what your children are hearing and experiencing between you and your partner , and what impact it ’ s having on them .
Maybe you just think , “ What choice do I have ?”
That is what I ’ m going to show you now , so you can understand the truth of where you are and what caused you to reach this point .
You do have a choice !
Remember what I said earlier ? That the colliding of two dynamics is responsible for this pattern of endless arguing ?
The first dynamic is the height of what Paul and I call the brick wall between you .
Each time there is a pain or upset in your relationship that remains unsolved , another brick goes into that wall .
Over time in a long-term relationship the brick wall between you gets so high that you can ’ t see or feel your partner anymore .
It gets difficult to even connect with how you used to feel about them , and you wonder if you can ever get that back again .
If you ’ re trapped in the pain of endless arguing , here are symptoms that the brick wall between you and your partner is getting high :
• No matter what you do or what falls out of your mouth , it ’ s met with criticism and complaints ( or eye-rolls and disdain ) from your partner .
• You and your partner used to just argue over the big things . Now you argue about the smallest ( stupidest ) things , like who left the bread tag on the counter ( As for the BIG things , you just don ’ t talk about them anymore ).
• It used to be only after a huge blowup that you wouldn ’ t talk to each other or go to bed without speaking . Now it seems like it ’ s almost every week that something happens and you go to bed without speaking .
• There ’ s too much arguing and bickering between you , between you and them and the kids , and between you and them about the kids .
• Even when you ’ re not arguing , the tension and distance between you is obvious . You feel it . Your spouse feels it . But what you ’ re really worried about is , “ Do my kids feel it ? And what is this doing to them ?”
Everything your partner says or does ends up filtered or flavored by that brick wall , so that even the little things that someone else could say and wouldn ’ t bother you actually trigger you when your partner says them .
98 www . AspireMAG . net | December 2023 / January 2024