Aspire Magazine: Inspiration for a Woman's Soul.(TM) Oct/Nov2019 Aspire Magazine | Page 68

Emotional Intelligence Some of the characteristics of healthy relationships embody what is known as emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence is about being adept in several core areas involving emotion within yourself and in your interactions with others. The areas of personal competence include self- awareness and management of both your emotions and your behaviors in response to them. Accurately perceiving your own emotions and positively channeling those emotions are key to becoming personally and socially competent. The other component of emotional intelli- gence is how accurately you tune in to the emotions of those around you and assess what might be going on with them, and whether you use this knowledge efficaciously to mediate your interactions with them. As you can imagine, emotional intelligence is something you want to develop and something you want to look for in a partner. Emotionally intelligent people experience much more successful platonic and romantic relationships, greater academic achievement, more positive interactions with their children, and greater success at work. In your search for love, you will be rejected (at least once!). Moreover, you will reject other people you meet. You may find someone to take a chance on, someone you believe has “potential.” But if you keep trying to change someone to fit the mold of what you desire, and it isn’t working, examine your motives and behavior. You must be realistic about a partner’s willingness to change. Don’t keep trying harder to fix him. Instead, move on and declare yourself open to finding someone capable of reciprocating love. There is nothing like sharing your life with a partner you can count on, one who is emotionally available to you and more than willing to love you back. Copyright ©2019 by Dr. Marni Feuerman. Excerpted from the book Ghosted and Breadcrumbed. Printed with permission from New World Library www.newworldlibrary.com. Dr. Marni Feuerman - Dr. Feuerman is the author of Ghosted and Breadcrumbed. She is a licensed social worker and marriage and family therapist with a private practice counseling those with relationship issues. She also trains therapists to do couples therapy and writes about love relationships for a number of online media. She lives in Boca Raton, Florida. Find out more about her work online at www.DrMarniOnline.com. 68 www.AspireMAG.net | October / November 2019