Aspire Magazine: Inspiration for a Woman's Soul.(TM) Oct/Nov 2017 Aspire Mag Full Issue: Feminine Wisdo | Page 29
Sustaining healthy energetic boundaries
increases our ability to infuse difficult
situations with positive energy―and
ultimately, to transform them. In choosing
to respond rather than react, we can diffuse
a negative situation and create a neutral
space in which the other person doesn’t
have anything to come up against. Without
something to react to, they are more likely to
calm down and even become aware of their
own reaction. Providing them with a mirror
of love in which to see themselves helps
them gain awareness of their behaviors.
Thus, holding them accountable for their
actions actually opens the possibility for
unconditionally loving interactions with them
in the future.
An additional benefit of showing kindness
and compassion to others for their self-
discoveries is that whenever such people
come into our lives, they also reveal
something about ourselves that we need to
either release or transform. So when we fear
getting hooked into any person’s negative
patterns we can also observe ourselves
to discover our own possible negative
patterns related to the exchange. Then we
can compassionately bless the person and
release the situation to resolve on its own.
When we open our hearts, withhold judgment,
and remain nonreactive, we experience
situations from a spiritually elevated
perspective; this gives us detachment as
well as the capacity to feel compassion for
even those who deceive or hurt us. “A truly
compassionate attitude toward others does
not change even if they behave negatively or
hurt you,” says His Holiness the Fourteenth
Dalai Lama.
Showing compassion for others’ struggles
and suffering allows us to discover valuable
information that may alter our perspective
on their plight. For instance, instead of
judging a person who neglected or abused
us as a child, we can investigate how they,
too, may have been neglected or abused,
and compassionately love the child they
were when they were hurt like us. Profound
compassion opens our hearts to empathy,
forgiveness and love, even to perfect
strangers.
Practicing compassionate detachment
gives us the power to transcend anyone
or anything that doesn’t originate
from the energy of love.
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Separating our reactions from someone
else’s gives us the detachment we need
to stop taking their reactions personally or
blaming them for ours. One way to remain
compassionate and responsive is to remind
ourselves that the other person is going
through their own process of self-discovery,
which likely has nothing to do with us. We
must trust that they are on their own soul’s
journey, and are creating the scenarios they
need to spiritually transform.