Aspire Magazine: Inspiration for a Woman's Soul.(TM) Jun/July 2019 Aspire Magazine FULL Issue | Page 27

Packing for an unknown destination makes decision-making so much harder. In addition to feeling frazzled, your burden includes managing a whole bunch of stuff that you may or may not use. We all know how it feels to be overwhelmed by too much stuff. As a professional organizer and life coach, I am called into people’s homes to help them navigate the clutter. Most people think that they have a clutter problem. I find the clutter is more like a messenger loudly proclaiming that you have skipped a very important step: honing in on your current life situation, a.k.a. your “destination.” The step of identifying who you are right now gets bypassed for a couple of reasons. First, you may have experienced life transitions like switching jobs, becoming an empty nester, having a health crisis, or retiring without altering how your home functions. In your mind, you are still cooking for a family of six even though it’s just the two of you. What food buying habits or food preparation habits would change when cooking for two instead of six? When you examine the situation consciously, it’s obvious that what you keep, the quantities you buy, and recipes sizes ought to shift. The key word here is consciously. I’ve noticed that the transitions that happen earlier in life, such as going to college, getting married or having children, require us to intentionally figure out what skills are required, what stuff we will use, and the support we need to rise to the new occasion. I’ve noticed that the transitions that happen earlier in life, such as going to college, getting married or having children, require us to intentionally figure out what skills are required, what stuff we will use, and the support we need to rise to the new occasion. In contrast, life transitions later in life might seem to just happen, leading you to look around at the clutter backlog and wonder, “How did I get so much stuff?” The second reason why someone may have skipped the step of identifying who she is now is that she feels like the best part of her life is over. Getting excited about the future makes sense for eighteen-year-olds. Does it apply when your best friend moves away, your spouse dies, or you have been diagnosed with a chronic condition? What does the process of self-discovery look like then? These life situations call for consciously enlisting support. Loving, compassionate support brings perspective. It creates a sacred space where you realize you are not alone. You gain a witness to your process. The process actually happens when you have support, rather than building up to more and more toxic levels. We become braver with support. Clarifying who you are now requires bravery. Before you think, “I’m not brave,” I’m going to 27