52 www. AspireMAG. net | December 2017 / January 2018
just didn’ t see how it applied to me. That is, until I experienced its depth on a personal level when I heard myself in the detailed description of one of the types. Now that I knew, the power of its teaching was palpable.
As I woke to the unconscious patterns of my personality, I began to more deeply see the truth of who I was. I began to let go of the unconscious need to prove that I had value. The more I released, the more free I became.
In each of the nine Enneagram types, the personality is trying to compensate for a perception that it has lost something from its true nature. For me it was the loss of the sense of inherent value. For others, it’ s the loss of the inherent gifts of strength, unity, sacredness, freedom, identity, clarity, faith and love.
As Russ and his co-teacher, Gayle Scott, began teaching the three centers of the Enneagram, a new awareness arose in me. Something was different. I was learning with my whole self, not just with my mind. My body and my heart were participating fully in the learning and the impact of the teaching was felt by all of me, not just my intellect. Little did I know that this was the beginning of tapping into the wisdom of my body and the tenderness of my heart to guide me along my inner journey. I now treasure the guidance and depth that my heart and body provide.
Although I was mesmerized by Russ and Gayle’ s teaching and I was learning so much, it wasn’ t until they spoke of the heart center, and specifically the Enneagram Type 3, that I was completely blown away. I could feel the well of emotion and grief rise up in me like a volcano. I dissolved into tears as Russ and Gayle talked about the endless efforts of the Type 3 to achieve success to cover up an unconscious fear of being worthless. I began to see how my life fit this pattern. Until this turning point moment, I had no idea that I was living my life to overcome this unconscious belief.
During a break in the workshop, I told Russ I thought my Enneagram personality type was consistent with Type 3. He kindly nodded in agreement. I recall telling him my reason for being in the world and going through everything I had up to that point, was to help people deepen their connection to the Divine. As the words came through me, I had no idea where they came from but somehow, I knew they were true. Something shifted sharply in my life at that precise moment.
The coincidence of meeting Russ one year to the day after my accident and having an open airline ticket to San Francisco to attend this workshop and deep learning opportunity felt so guided. I knew there was a greater force at work and that my life was really changing.
52 www. AspireMAG. net | December 2017 / January 2018