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I’ m here to tell you that you can express your authentic self, and you can contribute to the world in ways that are unique to you. But you have to get past the programming that says you’ re not worthy or enough as you are. And I’ m also here to say you’ re not alone. We all compare ourselves to others and it’ s completely normal, but when you bludgeon yourself in the process, you’ re not going to live the life you really want to live. You’ ll take action, but it won’ t be authentic action, and you’ ll feel exhausted and drained at the end of each day. You’ ll feel like something’ s missing. That something missing is your ability to fully honor and live your truth. Comparison is a sneaky little devil that presents itself in these ways:
Questioning Yourself
You’ re skipping along, feeling awesome and totally blissed about your life, until you find out someone you know makes more money than you or had a better summer vacation. Maybe, like me back in my corporate days, you’ re sitting in a meeting and wondering why you’ re not like this person or that one- you know, the ones who always have ideas and everyone oohs and aahs about. You think if you were more like them, you’ d get the promotions and the attention too. So you try to mold and shape your personality- or at least your work persona- to be that person. You try to do and say the right things, even if they don’ t feel authentic.
Focus on Weaknesses
And in molding and shaping your persona, you forget about the value you bring to the table. All the wonderful things about you get sidelined because you’ ve made up a story that they’ re not worthy of admiration by others. So instead of recognizing and using your talents and gifts, you try to improve on your perceived weaknesses instead. If you succeed, maybe people will accept you once and for all.
Not Feeling Like You’ re Enough
As you try to improve on your weaknesses, you realize it’ s not only an uphill battle, but you never feel you’ re enough. Even if you’ ve made some progress mastering that skill you, your mother, or a blogger at Forbes believe you should have, you still feel like a fraud. I’ m not exactly sure who said this, but it makes sense:“... if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.”
Focus on The Gap
You focus on that gap between where you are now and where you want to be- or think you should be. You SHOULD be more organized. You SHOULD make more money. You SHOULD drink all the green smoothies so you can be thinner and capture all the attention from all the guys at the bar at your next Girls Night Out. Closing the gap becomes your focus, even if you’ re frustrated that the scale is not moving in a downward direction or you got passed over yet again for a promotion. Sadly, you postpone your happiness until you’ re“ there.”
Stops You From Trying
If you fail at reaching your goals, you stop trying. You give up on yourself completely. So not only are you still blind to the gifts and strengths you have, you’ ve given up on
WISDOM & SELF-GROWTH
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