Aspire Magazine: Inspiration for a Woman's Soul.(TM) Apr/May 2018 Aspire Magazine Full Issue | Page 69
For years I went on and off diets, some sane,
some downright insane (hello, prepackaged
meals and freeze-dried snacks; I want a
refund). I went through long periods of
reckless abandonment, also known as
eating everything I craved until all my
clothes stopped fitting. When anything with
an elastic waistband became my preferred
pants for every outing, I would prepare for my
next big diet adventure. Eventually I stopped
going for extended periods of time in eating
denial. I evolved to binging and restricting all
within a week’s time.
Monday was always redemption day for me.
A fresh start and a new opportunity to finally
stop abusing myself with food. I would plan
my gym workouts, make my grilled chicken
and vegetables, and promise myself that
this week would be the start of something
permanent. The thought of finally feeling
good in my body evoked hopefulness and
desire, which changed my eating behavior
during the week. But by the end of the week,
I was tired, stressed, and ready to break free
from the almond-counting food prison of the
past five days. It was a subtle shift, but my
thoughts changed from “I want to feel good in
my body” to “It’s the weekend, and I deserve
comfort and rewards for all my hard work.”
That subtle shift in thought created new
emotions, which drove unhealthy weekend
behaviors time after time. I was the epitome
of the weekday warrior and the weekend
partier. No diet could save me. If I wanted
to make any real, permanent change, I had
to look internally to examine the underlying
thoughts that were consuming my brain.
Once I started using my formula to get to the
real root of the issue, true and permanent
change emerged.
Your thoughts are most likely subconscious;
they ride underneath the surface, and
you may not even notice they are there. If
you heighten your awareness and start
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